Hi Maria,
A very nice post. And I’ve read your blog. The early days of CML are hard or at least were for me too. It takes a lot of adjusting and a complete change of perspective.... this was always going to be as much if not more a mental battle.
As each test comes and goes we gain that little more confidence that we are here to stay in what seems like impossible circumstances. We don’t quite believe that we will almost certainly live normal and full lives. Some days you believe more than others.
I am 20 months in and this day last year was my first Xmas with CML. I felt mentally strained and on the edge, I felt the fear and helplessness of not being able to do anything about it. I wondered would I really see another Xmas with my wife and babies. I cried a lot.
You will have your days when this thing consumes you and you will have days when you are fine and coping well.
This is a learning process where we all learn to cope in our own way. You are not alone and we all understand truly everything you are feeling.
Be selfish and do the things that bring you joy, to relight a spark that I almost certainly lost for a long time.
Merry Xmas and happy new year to you! X
